CHILDREN + ANGER
I'm working this morning with Phil on the seminar on the Spiritual Training of children. We're hunched over the computer trying to edit 50+ pages of material into 50 minutes of teaching. Back and forth, over and over making those hard calls. Do we include this? Should we cut it? What about so-and-so? Won't this help? Is it too basic? Too wordy? While I'm working away on this for the next few months I'm going to post some tidbits here in Glimpses each week. Just overflow information that I wish I'd understood all those years ago when my children were being shaped into the people they would become.
Here's a list of less-than-obvious manifestations of anger in children. If you see some of these habits cropping up in your son or daughter (or yourself!), might I suggest that you ask the Father for wisdom and insight into your child's heart? Anger left to simmer works havoc with a child's happiness. And sometimes all it takes is a mama willing to slow down and deal decisively and prayerfully with it before its too late.
Manifestations of Anger:
- It can be an obvious temper tantrum,
- It can be more subtle like irritability or self-pity.
- It can look like a resentful attitude or
- A pattern of way over-reacting to minor incidents
- Sometimes it is the child who sulks and withdraws. You don’t think of her as angry because she doesn’t necessarily lash out, hers is a more simmering, stuffed down form of anger.
- Lots of angry boys lash out and hit someone, or they bang their fist on the desk.
We taught our kids that no one can make you angry, anger is a choice.
Yes, things will happen that will upset you, but we taught them that...
My response is my responsibility.
I cannot understate the importance of teaching this truth to your children NOW, before they swallow the two-sided lie:
1. That it is someone else’s fault that I am angry. (that is what abusers say)
2. That it is my fault when someone is angry with me. (this is what victims of abuse believe)
Praying for all of you as you shepherd this next generation,